Little Brother

God, I knew life could be hard.

I knew love suck.

I thought I knew what heartbreak was.

I thought I knew what it was to lose someone.

But now I’ve lost my little brother,

And it feels as if I’ve been ripped in half.

You gained your wings,

And I want so badly to follow,

But I can’t fly.

I’m just sitting here,

Looking through a constant lens of tears,

Reading the hundreds of comments on my Instagram post.

It wasn’t supposed to be you.

It was supposed to be someone else.

You were C.

You were always supposed to right here with me.

And now you’ve left me on my own.

And I’m not mad because I know you never meant to hit that semi,

But you did.

I know I was your big brother,

But right now I feel so much like your little brother.

Like you’ve gone off to hang with friends and you don’t want me around,

Like I’m not allowed to follow you.

If only you knew how much I want you to be here right now.

I’d give anything to show you another tiktok,

Or some new character in a videogame you don’t even like.

I just want to hug you in your bed while you push me off because you’re stronger than me.

I just want you to be here more than anything.

But I guess I’ll just have to live with everything.

Because you’re gone now.

And I miss you.

And I love you.

And you’ll always be my little brother.

I’ll blow out your birthday candles.

I’ll throw your graduation cap.

And I’ll miss you every day for the rest of my life.